Post-call Sharings....

Huhh.. currently post calls after working for 2 days... Having ''indigestions'' in the sense that there is so much thing to highlight here..

Lets talk about the upsetting part first. A part of me compiled a lot of sadness.. Those who had been accumulated from the day i started working till now.. Its the sufferings that a normal working ppl might be having. The scolding part and the blaming part play a big role for my sadness. This morning, i was accidentally given a job.. (as i passed by that area) whereby it was thrown to me without any further order or instructions.Then i was figuring out how to handle it..And i barely know what or how to do it. So, i jus do according to the simple order and ended up with disaster. I wasnt being informed that i have to do bla bla bla stuff... And i was ended up being scolded like a piece of shit.. Wat a nuisance.....

I think its a small matter only but i kept feeling upset for almost the whole day. After some deep thoughts..only then i figure out there are many things that occur the whole day.. A little of sarcasm, a little of criticism and in combination of a little scoldings. Then it builds up gradually until it reaches a mountain high of pain and sadness.. ANd with that, it has already crosses my threshold and i nearly blown up. I know that deep inside, i deserved to be happy .. Why? cos i do nothing wrong. And i was just trying to make things right.

But no matter what i do, there are mistakes occur...Why? Due to dissatisfactions. Cos i cant satisfy everybody. I am trying to be careful of everything that i do.. And try to be conscious about patient's feeling and emotions besides filtering things that need to be filtered before voicing out anything. The defence part that i used eventually wear off at the end of 2 days( or even longer).

Though i did do some tricks (like cheating the patient who continuously 24hrs need my help for something which cause such a nuisance...) There is one patient who ordered me to give him drugs that can reduce swelling in his legs.He asked for about ten times in a day while obviously his leg was not swollen at all.. He wouldnt stop nagging at me. And at last, what i can think about is PLACEBO.. I gave him water injections and told him that it was very effective in reducing swelling.. The next morning.. he told everybidy that i gave him a miracle drugs and the swelling resolved much. Hmm.. Do i worth a praise? eventually not...

I am holding a princip of ' service with a smile' but it works in only certain ways but having reverese reactions on the other way. Why i say so? cos ppl thinks that i am not easy to get angry and easier to be bullied. Can be a qualified punching bag without considering that i am actually a painful sack after all the punches.. I have my own ego and anger. Its just that i know anger dont work in either way. But to swallow it in silence is a painful and stressful task to fulfil. If anger works, the world will be having more and more wars.Endless chaos and crisis... What for..
So i need to advise myself to be patience... patient..

Ok.. untolerable.. Need a sleep to forget everything. Tomorrow will be another beautiful day ...